Saturday 17 November 2012

The Mating Game (With Beer and Bagpipes)


We’re looking at Pieter Huys’ work again today, although this time with 100% less naked bums and animal demons.  No, this is a simpler time, a simpler theme…and that theme is bagpipes.


"The Bagpiper Player and His Wife" is apparently “humorous treatment of the heterosexual joie de vivre.”  The bagpipes represent his man-bits, and the tankard, her lady-bits.  So apparently in life a man has a massive bag, some reedy bits, and whines a lot, while a woman has the capacity to put away a gallon of lager without batting an eye.  I’m less sure about whatever it is the woman is holding.  Is it a slice of buttered bread?  Does that represent the sexy buttery-ness that results from storing your bagpipes in a lady’s tankard?  She even brought the bedsheet to the performance, wrapped around her head. 

He doesn’t look very happy about this whole situation.  He holds his bagpipe defensively, and his expression says, “Dammit Mildred, you know I don’t have the teeth for your buttery bread anymore!”

18 comments:

  1. He doesn't look very keen, does he? I suspect he's pontificating about how tiring it is to blow those pipes, while she is hopefully offering him a piece of ginger root as an aphrodisiac. That tankard of hers will take some filling.

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    1. Ladies are very particular about their tankards being filled satisfactorily.

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  2. I think that the key thing to notice is that they are each holding their own.

    Mind you, when done well, sex can so very often be an unholy mix of making sounds similar to the bagpipes while wondering if the pot is half full or half empty.

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    1. It doesn't hurt to keep a set of partially inflated bagpipes under the mattress to make things sound more exciting if you're having an off night.

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    1. I pale to think of their family gatherings. Especially if every man is armed with bagpipes.

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  4. I think she's holding bread, indicating that she's a bit yeasty. That's why old Meth-Mouth is chastising her. Also, I really really really didn't want to think about sex looking at those two.

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    1. I hadn't considered it an artistic symbol of a yeast infection. Good call.

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  5. Maybe she just stomped on his toe. She looks kind of clumsy. And with the tankard o' brew...

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    1. She does kind of look like she's sashaying by in a less-than-sober manner, doesn't she? Poor bagpipe-man.

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  6. I love overt phallic/vaginal symbols. It makes me feel smart for noticing them when really, it's rather perverted.

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    1. People throughout the ages have been perverts. Working on this blog has revealed this to me more than ever. But you should still feel smart for noticing, because really bagpipes and tankards are not innately sexy!

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  7. To me it looks like he's yawning. And he's holding up his hand to say "Hold on one sec, I need to yawn." And then she's waiting for him to stop yawning. This painting is adrenaline fueled excitement.

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    1. Oh yeah...it's really...thrillinzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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  8. Well that was an instant sexual buzzkill. There are just some people I don't want to picture mating.

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    1. Based on his work, I thing Huys was probably a walking sexual buzzkill.

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  9. Maybe she found the buttered bread in the tankard and is accusing him of hiding in there because he doesn't have the teeth the eat it but was to embarrassed to say so.

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    1. It could indeed be an accusing look on her face, and one of shocked embarrassment at discovery on his. He should have just filled the tankard with soup to soften the bread and had a tasty, less tooth-intensive meal.

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