Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Sexy Fairy Action (And Forest Creature Abuse)

Sir Joseph Noel Paton is a 19th century Scottish fairy-painter.  In that he painted a lot of fairies, not that he was one himself.  He painted other things too, but here we will be looking at fairies.  Just to give you fae warning.

...Right.  On to the painting.  The title is "The Quarrel of Oberon and Titania," depicting Titania telling Oberon to keep his dirty hands off of her Indian boy-toy.  Amorous hijinks ensue.  Amorous hijinks really make up most of what is happening in this picture, so we will ignore those and look at some of the goings-on that don't involve much fairy erotica.

First: the Snail Cowboy.  He roams the forest ranges, herding earthworms and tormenting annoyed goblins.

Continuing in the abuse of tiny animals, here is a demented moth wrangler.  Maybe moths ate all the fairies' clothes, making them natural enemies and explaining why minimal gauzy sheets are their garments of choice here.

Moving into proper fairy bloodsport, here a group of fairies appears to be trying to beat an owl in flight, except possibly for the fairy directly below it, who looks like she is rather distracted.  The owl looks like it will need therapy, in any case.

But sometimes, the tiny creatures get their own back, as this spider finds its dinner.  Mmmm, tasty fairy midget.

This group of cartoonish villains presents their leader with a weeping ball of subjugated fairy maiden, and....a slug.  Neither of these offerings seems to calm the boss, who remains angry or constipated.  Some sort of scheme appears to be afoot against the quarreling king and queen, who are about ten times their size.  A scheme that involves DIY, given the tools in Fearless Leader's grasp.

I assume this is meant to be a playful pounce....but OH LORD THOSE EYES.  He looks like he's going to claw her face off. 

And finally, a man's dream way to die: being strangled in old age by two hot, nude women in a jacuzzi.

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