The Environmental Protection Agency: that
bastion of protecting the land, water, and air, insofar as it is not more
profitable to do otherwise. It turns out
their building is pretty dramatic, too.
It’s not so much green as it is “hulking stone.” Now you, too, can experience its wonder and
majesty through the power of my crummy photography.
A series of faces lines the border of the
building. Some of them seem to be
related to crops, like this corn-lord….
 |
| With a face that says, if you try to turn
me into high fructose corn syrup one more
time, I will ram my cob up some orifices you will find unpleasant |
Or his girlfriend, the Dame of Wheat.
 |
| Part Harvest Goddess, part Princess Leia,
all vacant eyes that will steal your soul |
Some of them are more concerned with
animals. Here a man with epic facial hair
wears a stylish lion hoodie.
 |
| Lions: No. 1 Animal Concern in the U.S. |
Or this man, who is adorned with…I want to
say an angry Bulbasaur.
 |
| Did you know that due to their popularity
in bloodsports, the Pokemon is a highly endangered species? |
There are more detailed vignettes adorning the top of the building, that almost invariably involve naked people using
large animals as lounge chairs.
You can lounge naked on a bull.
Or on a horse. Perhaps you would enjoy
having an eagle stroke your rod while doing so.
My personal favorite is this lady lounging
on a hippocampus, a.k.a. mer-horse.
Note the creature’s shocked and indignant expression
as she gently caresses his tail.
 |
| I say, madam! Some decency, please. |
The dolphins are getting the heck out of
dodge before things get out of hand.
The central image combines these elements
and more: naked bull lounging, naked horse lounging, an eagle eying up a torch
for nuzzling potential, a half-dressed lady ready to start some forest fires,
and a naked male that is either a dwarf or an extremely well-developed young boy.
Perhaps the latter highlights the benefits
of overconsumption of hormones in food and water?
